Last January I was in an accident that I probably shouldn’t have walked away from. I was going 100-110km/hr on the highway when I hit a patch of black ice and lost control of my car. I tried to swerve a couple times to correct myself but had little control. Luckily there were no cars around as I took up both lanes and eventually went off to the left. My car caught air as I drove off the highway, at which point I closed my eyes to avoid seeing what was about to happen and to avoid getting dizzy. (I know – my biggest concern was getting dizzy!) But I had a strange sense of calm – knowing that there was nothing I could do to change the situation – and I just tried to breathe slowly. I knew whatever was going to happen would happen fast, but I just wanted the moment to be over. I felt the impact as I flipped end over end and then rolled 4 times before coming to a stop. While rolling I kept getting hit by the things that were in my passenger seat… clothes, a laptop, the baseball I use for trigger points in my back and hips, etc. Once I came to a stop I took a moment to collect myself and my thoughts. I could hear the static loud on the radio because my iPod flew and disconnected from the transmitter, and I could hear the windshield wipers going which seemed weird. Before even opening my eyes I wiggled my fingers and toes, finding a sense of relief that I could do that. Then I opened my eyes and turned the car off, hoping it wouldn’t start on fire or that the airbag wouldn’t deploy and hit me in the face now. I realized what had happened as I lay drivers side down, and saw a small cut and bruise forming on my head. I took my seatbelt off so I could sit normally instead of hanging sideways and then I searched for my phone (which luckily was still in my purse) to call 911.
Fast-forward and a couple days later I was flying home to see my parents. This was when it started hitting me a bit more. As I got through airport security I was greeted by the beautiful voice of a local artist playing guitar and singing. I am sure the people around there thought I was crazy (and I won’t disagree with them) but I went and sat there by myself and cried. All I kept thinking was how fortunate I am to be here right now. How blessed I am that I can sit here and listen to such beautiful music. I wanted to go tell the guy what I’d been through and how much I appreciated his lovely and soothing voice, but I figured that would just be disruptive. Instead I opted for a subtler way of showing my interest, and when I calmed down I went and bought a couple of his CD’s. After listening to him for almost two hours I got on the flight and landed back in Winnipeg where my dad was picking me up. He held my hand for the whole drive home, and even though I’m not a touchy-feely person, I let him, because I was so happy that I got to see him again. When we got to my moms place she ran outside to give me a big hug. And as we walked in the house I saw my favourite girl wagging her tail and whining and I started to cry. All of these people in my life that I couldn’t imagine not seeing again, and that I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to.
The moral of my story is that these are the moments. The moments that make you really appreciate all that you’ve been given in life, and that make you realize how fast it can all be taken from you. I don’t know if everyone gets such drastic reminders as I feel I do – but the small reminders are always there too. They remind us to stop and take a look around. To enjoy the moment and find the beauty around us, because there is beauty in every moment! They remind us that life happens fast and no matter how much control you think you have – you really don’t. And by reminding us how quickly something can happen – we are reminded that our happiness is what’s most important in life. Because you never know when your last day is, so you might as well choose to be happy.
The day is still young… what will you choose?
**if you’re interested you can see the full post on my blog.. beingkarmic.com
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